From the moment that I felt that you were to plant something that was eventually to bloom in the future, I already had an agreement with myself that no assumptions of any kind would be made. Even if people are telling me that there is really something there, I am still sticking to those words, going with the flow and just being swayed to where it is leading. All this will remain unchanged until I get a solid proof of its existence.
No expectations. No assumptions. No anything.
Weirdly enough, there are no butterflies also. Whenever you say something that’s supposed to make me feel giddy, I feel no hint of giddiness. I see no sparks in your eyes every time I look at them. There is no magnet that keeps (or makes to begin with) me hooked on to you. There is no vision of us being romantically together in the future…
Maybe, the late night talks, chat conversations ’till the wee hours of the morning, and the nonstop exchange of text messages are nothing but just empty expressions of whatnot. Maybe, just maybe… I want to be just your friend.
Or maybe I’m just being too emotional right now that I am inputting all these shitty crap in here to let it all out of my system. I don’t know. I just don’t know anymore.