At two o’ clock in the afternoon, I was wakened by the sound of my cellular phone, indicating that I got a text message. I got up, checked it, and saw that there were three unread messages. One of the messages was from him, the person who keeps me up with the thoughts that I shouldn’t even be bothering about. His text message was very random and it again got me to thinking if he really likes me or what. With what he texted, it seemed like he sent me a message just for the sake of sending me a message. It was something like, “Heeeyy, I have credits! If you text me, I’d reply. And we could probably talk for a little while.” Yup, that type of text messages. I didn’t reply to him but he filled my thoughts for most of the day.
Think. Think. Think.
While doing so, this certain friend came to mind. I remember that the first we met, I felt the wanting in me to be friends with this person. I would text or tell him random things and would remember the things that he likes. I would take note of the things that make him unique. Eventually, we became friends and we still are. Thinking about all this, I went back to my intention why I wanted to be friends with him in the first place. I wanted to be friends with him because I found him really interesting, like he was the type of person whom I could share my problems with, the one who would understand me… There was interest but there was no attraction, though. I thought that he would be a good friend and didn’t think of him as a future love.
This thought enlightened me.
Maybe, just maybe, what this certain person to me before is what I am to him now. No love interest, just plain interest. Maybe, he is found me interesting because I look like the person he loves. Maybe, he wants us to be just friends. Maybe, he treats me the way he does to his other friends. Maybe, it’s that simple. Maybe. Just maybe.
I don’t understand why I think about these things when I know that I shouldn’t. Well, it’s probably because I am attracted to him. And somehow, there’s this little something in me wishing that he likes me, too, that is why I spend time assessing the happenings when they could be just normal.
What you see is what you get.
So might as well stop overthinking because it just wastes your time.
And more than that, it ruins you.